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Andrei Bolocan, with humor about humor in Moldova /INTERVIEW

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Soon Moldova will celebrate 25 years from the declaration of independence. Accordingly, Moldova.ORG launched a new category named “Moldova at 25”. We discuss with experts from different domains and try to learn how or if the latter develop during these years of independence.

This time, we talked to the comedian Andrei Bolocan, the founder of Lumina show and a member of the Moldovan diaspora from Canada.

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I usually talk to a dear person from the house, Nata (Nata Albot- moldova.org), maybe you know her, also a vlogger. She often makes a “pft” or a “khm-khm” when hearing my jokes. This is the maximum my jokes provoke- coughing. I need to create a new type of humor. There exist insult and black humor, while I will create coughing humor. Humor that makes you cough. An entire hall of people would cough and say “Ha! Bravo!”. No more. I can do this, yeah.

***

Hail the gods, my imaginary and untouchable god, I wasn’t serious and sometimes it happened to be and then, I would regret that I was serious. I think in high-school I didn’t have this limit, the limitation in seriousness. At “Mircea Eliade” Lyceum we had a libertarian and permissive environment for dumb things, starting from… When I was talking to the people from our neighborhood, at Telecentru, about what we used to do at school, they would go crazy, because they wouldn’t do those things at 39th School or somewhere else. We were supposed to write poems, to participate at recitals, we had literary clubs, debate clubs in Romanian and English, international debate competitions, intelectual games. It was a pretty colourful life, that at the same time would help you to have different layers of conversations. You could talk to taxi drivers, politicians, go to meetings of poets, for example. These were things we would do at school. Those meetings were pretty funny, by the way.

***

Seriousness and its norms were felt by me after finishing school, when a short segment appeared in my life, called ASEM (Academy of Economic Studies of Moldova- Moldova.ORG) or when finding a job, when interviewing people on the streets when I used to work for a TV channel. When seeing people who would walk elegantly, slowly and hearing them say “I am hurrying, I am sorry” when I was trying to ask for an interview. That would happen in slow-motion and cause you a bitter taste of “This is Moldova, this is it!!!”. It is, you know. Probably this seriousness comes up when I am at a certain age and people ask: “I don’t believe you were able of this! You disappointed me! How could you?”

***

“The price of the Moldovan humor!” No, there is no need for titles. I tried to gather people in a place, I saw I gathered 300 and then another 300. Then I said “Wow, what a nice concept!”. If I managed to make happy 600 out of 600, it’s good. I felt happy and this could be seen, I guess. An ocean of craziness and happiness embraced me, I would like to try this again. Definitely. It’s worth trying, worth burning calories, rehearsing, believing in your jokes, writing 83 pages of jokes, saying “Wow, so many jokes!”, and then crossing them out and saying “No, I don’t have any!”. Then, frustrated, you write them again, a week’s left until the show and you enter a crisis of panic, you argue with people from your house… It’s worth the experience, seriously!

***

I understood that people on the internet are keen to consume social-political news, people watch news and they need an opinion. I don’t know whether this formed at the level of conditioned or unconditioned reflex, but people really wants it, especially on the internet, where everything happens quickly. There are people who send me news to comment on them, but I comment only on things that inspire me and touches me. There are topics I simply ignore. There are people sending me letters meant for the Prosecution Office, to courts, because I can’t be a prosecutor on the internet. It would be incorrect. Moreover, I am diverse and I don’t enhance myself in any limits.

***

I would do comedy in English on the internet and this is one of my frustrations. But it is obvious I wouldn’t be able to talk in English about the wonderful and charming mister Candu… Although I am sure the universality of his figure would win over millions of hearts! I miss Candu very much!

***

If humor is to see the candy where the shit is, quoting Fedot Bernstein, then the humor is good. It is nice to laugh over the people that are well-dressed, super serious, call themselves Marian Lupu and make indecent gestures in Parliament. Then, they speak to cover an inner voice that says “Stop. Stop you, don’t say this, no”, but he says “Paralelipiped, tractor, transcendence”. How does he speak when he buys bread? This is a question, but the answer is that he doesn’t bread, the bread finds him, everything is stable for him”.

***

I am a person with unfinished majors, that knows and is convinced that he is not intelligent, but a person who searches for methods and ways to form his book of happiness, to easily walk through life…

This would be the motto of Andrei Bolocan. To be intelligent, to take me seriously, to seem a proper person for myself.

I don’t know, you ask me how can i describe myself, I don’t know. I have a friend who is 29 as me. And we have been asking ourselves for 10 years when the age of 19 would go away. The years passed, but not many things happened in terms of intelligence. There are people who wake up and know what to do with their lives. I am not that kind of person. I search for myself and this searching has been going on for more years. While you are searching for yourself, you have at least the excuse that you are not sure of something and you know you weren’t sure about things in the past. The doubt gives you space for maneuvering. It is super nice, very few people assume that they are not right.

And I am one of those who assume they are not right, I consider myself special! Marian Lupu, cheers!

***

– I am Moldova! Moldova! What a nice campaign slogan! You are Moldova! Moldova, are, I am!
– You are Moldova yourself!
– You are Moldova yourself! Very nice! I would create an independent television for this campaign. Do you believe in independent television?
– MoldovaTV!
– MoldovaTV! Moldova, I want you!

***

Roșca disappointed you in 2005. Someone else disappointed you, Ghimpu disappointed a lot of people. Enough! We need to form, as in math, by deduction, the theory. One betrayed you, then two, three, make the conclusion. All of them are betrayers. Don’t overreact, all of them, for money, are ready to change the boat. The political journalism, the women, the men, the guys, the girls that take interviews from these dubious people that can do bad things you wouldn’t think of for money. Then you think: “Who am i talking to? To a high-level politician?” No, you talking to a disgusting person, betrayer and you need to realize this.

***

The country is so small, but look what beauties we have, what a rich mozaic we have. There exists Irina Alegrova, 140 years old, who loves Shor. There exists Chișinău that is under limits and is disappointed by Chirtoacă, although there are people who think he is guarding angel of the city. There is the rest of country that receives on Easter a cow or a hammer from Sergiu Sârbu and Marian Lupu, and they are happy. You understand? He did a good thing for them. How could you be angry to a person that brought a cow to you? How much is a cow, 6-10 thousand lei?

***

Pavel Filip seems very funny to me. Because often his face that appears in news is a a face of a very tired man. He is a sad person because he does the work he does. Some ask why politicians do things in a wrong way. Because they often do things they don’t like.

***

The political class is very unrepresentative for such people as us, that want something else. We want active people. The fact that they have smart watches and know about social media… Fuck it! Wake up! Step on the earth! Think of the problems young people have, otherwise than via social media. The youth from your party is not the entire youth of Moldova. The trolls who comment for your party are not all the young people of Moldova. Open the door for critical thinking! Did you notice they don’t react at all at critics? They just let us judge them… No, wait, guys! This is not a path. No, this a path for bicycles, and I would go on my bike during the working hours and I would give alcohol to the workers that install the pavement of Ștefan Cel Mare street. An action of a mayor! How often are you drunk during the working hours? How legal is that? And it was shown on ProTV. If am right, he is married to someone from there. But this doesn’t have any sense, she is in politics. While Chirtoacă is in the City Council. How can this happen?

***

Moldova, I don’t know who you are for me. For sure, you are not an independent state. I don’t want to put you in constitutional limits. Moldova for me is a handful of people, some two-three place where I have memories to smell. I would very much like Moldova to give me, out of disappointment and optimism, only reasons for optimism. Every time, Moldova, when you call me, I would like to come here for a recharge of life, that I can feel only here.

Author: Ana Gherciu

Correspondent reporter of Moldova.org Focus: Transnistrian conflict settlement, Eastern Partnership. Inquiries at [email protected]

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Society

“They are not needy, but they need help”. How Moldovan volunteers try to create a safe environment for the Ukrainian refugees

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At the Government’s ground floor, the phones ring constantly, the laptop screens never reach standby. In one corner of the room there is a logistics planning meeting, someone has a call on Zoom with partners and donors, someone else finally managed to take a cookie and make some coffee. Everyone is exhausted and have sleepy red eyes, but the volunteers still have a lot of energy and dedication to help in creating a safe place for the Ukrainian refugees.

“It’s like a continuous bustle just so you won’t read the news. You get home sometimes and you don’t have time for news, and that somehow helps. It’s a kind of solidarity and mutual support,” says Vlada Ciobanu, volunteer responsible for communication and fundraising.

The volunteers group was formed from the very first day of war. A Facebook page was created, where all types of messages immediately started to flow: “I offer accommodation”, “I want to help”, “I want to get involved”, “Where can I bring the products?”, “I have a car and I can go to the customs”. Soon, the authorities also started asking for volunteers’ support. Now they all work together, coordinate activities and try to find solutions to the most difficult problems.

Is accommodation needed for 10, 200 or 800 people? Do you need transportation to the customs? Does anyone want to deliver 3 tons of apples and does not know where? Do you need medicine or mobile toilets? All these questions require prompt answers and actions. Blankets, sheets, diapers, hygiene products, food, clothes – people bring everything, and someone needs to quickly find ways of delivering them to those who need them.

Sometimes this collaboration is difficult, involves a lot of bureaucracy, and it can be difficult to get answers on time. “Republic of Moldova has never faced such a large influx of refugees and, probably because nobody thought this could happen, a mechanism of this kind of crisis has not been developed. Due to the absence of such a mechanism that the state should have created, we, the volunteers, intervened and tried to help in a practical way for the spontaneous and on the sport solutions of the problems,” mentions Ecaterina Luțișina, volunteer responsible for the refugees’ accommodation.

Ana Maria Popa, one of the founders of the group “Help Ukrainians in Moldova/SOS Українці Молдовa” says that the toughest thing is to find time and have a clear mind in managing different procedures, although things still happen somehow naturally. Everyone is ready to intervene and help, to take on more responsibilities and to act immediately when needed. The biggest challenges arise when it is necessary to accommodate large families, people with special needs, for which alternative solutions must be identified.

Goods and donations

The volunteers try to cope with the high flow of requests for both accommodation and products of all kinds. “It came to me as a shock and a panic when I found out that both mothers who are now in Ukraine, as well as those who found refuge in our country are losing their milk because of stress. We are trying to fill an enormous need for milk powder, for which the demand is high and the stocks are decreasing”, says Steliana, the volunteer responsible for the distribution of goods from the donation centers.

Several centers have been set up to collect donations in all regions of Chisinau, and volunteers are redirecting the goods to where the refugees are. A system for processing and monitoring donations has already been established, while the volunteer drivers take over the order only according to a unique code.

Volunteers from the collection centers also do the inventory – the donated goods and the distributed goods. The rest is transported to Vatra deposit, from where it is distributed to the placement centers where more than 50 refugees are housed.

When they want to donate goods, but they don’t know what would be needed, people are urged to put themselves in the position of refugees and ask themselves what would they need most if they wake up overnight and have to hurriedly pack their bags and run away. Steliana wants to emphasise that “these people are not needy, but these people need help. They did not choose to end up in this situation.”

Furthermore, the volunteer Cristina Sîrbu seeks to identify producers and negotiate prices for products needed by refugees, thus mediating the procurement process for NGOs with which she collaborates, such as Caritas, World Children’s Fund, Polish Solidarity Fund, Lifting hands, Peace Corps and others.

One of the challenges she is facing now is the identifying a mattress manufacturer in the West, because the Moldovan mattress manufacturer that has been helping so far no longer has polyurethane, a raw material usually imported from Russia and Ukraine.

Cristina also needs to find solutions for the needs of the volunteer groups – phones, laptops, gsm connection and internet for a good carrying out of activities.

Hate messages

The most difficult thing for the communication team is to manage the hate messages on the social networks, which started to appear more often. “Even if there is some sort of dissatisfaction from the Ukrainian refugees and those who offer help, we live now in a very diverse society, there are different kind of people, and we act very differently under stress,” said Vlada Ciobanu.

Translation by Cătălina Bîrsanu

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Important

#WorldForUkraine – a map that shows the magnitude of the world’s actions against Russian aggression

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The international community and volunteers from all over te world have launched #WorldForUkraine as a platform that shows the magnitude of the world’s actions against the Russian aggression. In a digital world – it is an interactive map of public support of Ukrainians under the hashtag #WorldForUkraine – rallies, flash mobs, protests around the world. In the physical dimension – it is your opportunity to take to the streets and declare: “No to Putin’s aggression, no to war.”

„Today, along with the political and military support, emotional connection with the civilized world and truthful information are extremely important for Ukraine. The power to do it is in your hands. Join the #WorldForUkraine project and contribute to the victorious battle against the bloodshed inflicted on Ukraine by the aggression of the Russian Federation”, says the „about the project” section of the platform.

Go to the streets — Tell people — Connect and Unite — Become POWERFUL

Volunteers have launched #WorldForUkraine as a platform that shows the magnitude of the world’s actions against Russian aggression. In digital world – it is an INTERACTIVE MAP of public support of Ukrainians worldforukraine.net under the hashtag #WorldForUkraine – rallies, flash mobs, protests around the world. In the physical dimension – it is your opportunity to take to the streets and declare: “No to Putin’s aggression, no to war.” There you may find information about past and future rallies in your city in support of Ukraine. This is a permanent platform for Ukrainian diaspora and people all over the world concerned about the situation in Ukraine.

So here’s a couple of things you could do yourself to help:

* if there is a political rally in your city, then participate in it and write about it on social media with geolocation and the hashtag #WorldForUkraine

* if there are no rallies nearby, organize one in support of Ukraine yourself, write about it on social media with geolocation adding the hashtag #WorldForUkraine

The map will add information about gathering by #WorldForUkraine AUTOMATICALLY

Your voice now stronger THAN ever

All rallies are already here: https://worldforukraine.net

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Important

How is Moldova managing the big influx of Ukrainian refugees? The authorities’ plan, explained 

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From 24th to 28th of February, 71 359 Ukrainian citizens entered the territory of Republic of Moldova. 33 173 of them left the country. As of this moment, there are 38 186 Ukrainian citizens in Moldova, who have arrived over the past 100 hours. 

The Moldovan people and authorities have organized themselves quickly from the first day of war between Russia and Ukraine. However, in the event of a prolonged armed conflict and a continuous influx of Ukrainian refugees, the efforts and donations need to be efficiently managed. Thus, we inquired about Moldova’s long-term plan and the state’s capacity to receive, host, and treat a bigger number of refugees. 

On February 26th, the Ministry of Labor and Social Protection of Moldova approved the Regulation of organization and functioning of the temporary Placement Center for refugees and the staffing and expenditure rules. According to the Regulation, the Centers will have the capacity of temporary hosting and feeding at least 20 persons, for a maximum of 3 months, with the possibility of extending this period. The Centers will also offer legal, social, psychological, and primary medical consultations to the refugees. The Center’s activity will be financed from budget allocations, under Article 19 of Provision no. 1 of the Exceptional Situations Commission from February 24th, 2022, and from other sources of funding that do not contravene applicable law.

The Ministry of Inner Affairs and the Government of Moldova facilitated the organization of the volunteers’ group “Moldova for Peace”.  Its purpose is to receive, offer assistance and accommodation to the Ukrainian refugees. The group is still working on creating a structure, registering and contacting volunteers, etc. It does not activate under a legal umbrella. 

Lilia Nenescu, one of the “Moldova for Peace” volunteers, said that the group consists of over 20 people. Other 1700 registered to volunteer by filling in this form, which is still available. The group consists of several departments: 

The volunteers’ department. Its members act as fixers: they’re responsible for connecting the people in need of assistance with the appropriate department. Some of the volunteers are located in the customs points. “The Ministry of Inner Affairs sends us every day the list of the customs points where our assistance is needed, and we mobilize the volunteers”, says Lilia Nenescu. 

The Goods Department manages all the goods donated by the Moldavian citizens. The donations are separated into categories: non-perishable foods and non-food supplies. The volunteers of this department sort the goods into packages to be distributed. 

The Government intends to collect all the donations in four locations. The National Agency for Food Safety and the National Agency for Public Health will ensure mechanisms to confirm that all the deposited goods comply with safety and quality regulations. 

The Service Department operates in 4 directions and needs the volunteer involvement of specialists in psychology, legal assistance (the majority of the refugees only have Ukrainian ID and birth certificates of their children); medical assistance; translation (a part of the refugees are not Ukrainian citizens). 

According to Elena Mudrîi, the spokesperson of the Ministry of Health, so far there is no data about the number of  Covid-19 positive refugees. She only mentioned two cases that needed outpatient medical assistance: a pregnant woman and the mother of a 4-day-old child. 

The Accommodation Department. The volunteers are waiting for the centralized and updated information from the Ministry of Labor about the institutions offering accommodation, besides the houses offered by individuals. 

The Transport Department consists of drivers organized in groups. They receive notifications about the number of people who need transportation from the customs points to the asylum centers for refugees.

The municipal authorities of Chișinău announced that the Ukrainian children refugees from the capital city will be enrolled in educational institutions. The authorities also intend to create Day-Care Centers for children, where they will be engaged in educational activities and will receive psychological assistance. Besides, the refugees from the municipal temporary accommodation centers receive individual and group counseling. 

In addition to this effort, a group of volunteers consisting of Ana Gurău, Ana Popapa, and Andrei Lutenco developed, with the help of Cristian Coșneanu, the UArefugees platform, synchronized with the responses from this form. On the first day, 943 people offered their help using the form, and 110 people asked for help. According to Anna Gurău, the volunteers communicate with the Government in order to update the platform with the missing data. 

Translation from Romanian by Natalia Graur

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